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Hide Your Kids: The Philadelphia Flyers’ New Mascot “Gritty” is a Giant Orange Monster With Googly Eyes

Published

6 years ago

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We can’t figure out whether to give him a big hug or run for our lives.

At a special event this morning, the Philadelphia Flyers presented “Gritty” to a crowd of 600 children, a new team mascot who is said to be taking an active role in community outreach. Gritty, as it turns out, is a seven-foot-tall fuzzy orange monster with googly eyes, a massive beard and wild eyebrows. His origin story, well, it reads like something out of a horror movie.

According to the official press release, “Gritty claims that he’s been around for a lot longer than we know it, and recent construction at the Wells Fargo Center disturbed his secret hideout forcing him to show his face publicly for the first time. As his home has been deep inside the Wells Fargo Center for an unknown amount of time, Gritty has also picked up solid skating and hockey abilities.”

The character’s bio continues, “He has some oddities that are both humorous and strange. A number of times he’s been caught eating snow straight from the Zamboni machine, and unbeknownst to most, his love of hot dogs has been inflating the Flyers Dollar Dog Night consumption totals for years.”

Oh and if all this wasn’t already strange enough, Gritty has a squeaky belly button, as well as the ability to blow smoke out of his ears. He drives a car that shoots t-shirts into the crowd.

Naturally, Twitter has been having a field day with Gritty, mocking him all day and dubbing him “nightmare fuel.” They’re not wrong. If the eyes truly are the windows to the soul, then it seems pretty safe to assume that Gritty has eaten a few children in his day. But it would seem he’s looking to redeem himself, and that’s more than we can say for most here in 2018.

He’s kinda cute, in a My Pet Monster sorta way. Don’t ya think?

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Writer in the horror community since 2008. Editor in Chief of Bloody Disgusting. Owns Eli Roth's prop corpse from Piranha 3D. Has four awesome cats. Still plays with toys.

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The Further

Spirit Halloween Now Selling a Fog-Spewing Replica of the Atomic Ray Gun from ‘Mars Attacks’!

Published

3 days ago

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April 29, 2024

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After releasing a 6-foot tall Martian Warrior animatronic last year, Spirit Halloween is back this year with another brand new item for fans of the Mars Attacks trading cards/movie.

Straight from the cult-classic Mars Attacks, and now up for grabs this week, the officially licensed Atomic Ray Gun prop features functioning fog, intergalactic lights and sound!

The Atomic Ray Gun also comes with a black-light-activated collectible poster.

Spirit Halloween previews, “The Martians have returned to cause complete mayhem this Halloween! Did we mention they’re armed? Prepare yourself for the Martian invasion this Halloween by strapping yourself up with this officially licensed Mars Attacks Atomic Ray Gun. This atomic ray gun prop is just like the one the Martians use to vaporize any humans that get in their way of global destruction. You’ll be equipped to survive any Martian attack once you get your hands on it for yourself.

“Using the included refillable water tank, you can refill your weapon of destruction whenever you’re getting low on juice. Featuring intergalactic sounds along with a blue LED light-up barrel, and a green LED light-up nozzle that shoots actual fog mist when turned on, this officially licensed fog gun is perfect for fans to show off their fandom for Mars Attacks this Halloween.”

You can grab yours today for $129.99 over on Spirit Halloween’s website.

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