19 things you should know before dating a girl with tattoos

1. Be prepared for ALL the staring. Summer (and the wearing of skirts/shorts/t-shirts) means a lot of people have their eyes glued to our tattooed bits. It gets old very quickly so don't be alarmed if we stare right back in their gormless faces.

2. Don't ask if they hurt. Do you know how a tattoo works? BC it ain't exactly a walk in the park. It's hardly going to be painless now is it. St00pid question numero uno.

3. Or how much they cost. Honestly! Do you walk up to people in the street and ask them how much their clothes cost? No, BC it's weird and kind of personal.

4. We spend a lorra time thinking about them. Unless we're getting a LOLZ tattoo (see points 7 and 8), chances are we've spent ages stalking our fave artists on Instagram until they have available appointments.

5. And are always planning more. Those people that have one tattoo and don't want any more? They are like unicorns: magical and rare. Most of us only wanted one to begin with but hey, look how that turned out.

6. Strangers touch us (without permission) in the street. They grab our legs, poke our arms, prod our backs and it is SO. EFFING. DRAINING.

7. Not every tattoo has some deep meaning behind it. Sure, it's lovely when people get tattooed to commemorate someone special to them, but sometimes tattoos are just there because they look nice and that is fine.

8. We've probs got a joke tattoo (or two). Basically the more tattoos you get, the less you care about 'defacing' your body.

9. And maybe one we wish we hadn't got. It's kinda obscene that you can get tattooed when you're 18 and have no clue about style/what looks good. I'm not saying we regret any of them, but some of us will have a few that don't really match our vibe anymore.

10. Sometimes we just want to cover them all up. On days when we CBA to deal with the street gropers, disapproving looks and general fuckery of the public, we'll wear neck to toe-covering outfits because it's just not worth the hassle sometimes.

11. We may have the occasional freak out. Occasionally, when drunk or having a millennial existential crisis, we'll realise they are there FOR LIFE and the whole thing will seem totally weird.

12. No, we do not care if you have them or not. Tattooed people don't only date tattooed people and it's insane to think so. Not got any? Couldn't give less of a sh*t, pal.

13. When people ask "how many have you got?" it is THE most annoying thing. Like, I don't know, I genuinely have never counted and why would I? This means nothing, please stop asking.

14. Job interviews can be a nightmare for us. The inner turmoil is *real*. Do you be fully and wholeheartedly yourself and rock up flashing your arm tattoos, or cover them and slowly release them one by one after you get the job?

15. On holiday we're gonna be all over the factor 50. Taking good care of our tattoos is super important, and slathering ourselves in factory fiddy will stop them from fading/ageing badly.

16. Strangers always show us their own (despite us not asking). We've lost count of the number of times weird men down the pub have lifted up their shirts to show us their tattooed pot bellies. We do not wish for this, obviously.

17. There is no greater joy than shaving over a hairy tattoo. When hair grows over a tattoo on say, a leg, it looks all fuzzy and weird. Seeing it clean-shaven and moisturised is like looking in the mirror when you've just had a blow dry. Stunning.

18. The healing process is kinda a bitch, so do not touch us during this time. Don't be snugglin' up in bed next to us when we've just been tattooed. It stings, it's gooey, and then it's gonna all flake off.

19. People still make assumptions about us. We've been judged as dodgy, slutty, careless, disrespectful, unemployed, criminal, unattractive... the list truly goes on.

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